Sunday, February 22, 2009

Say hello to Ace! Ace is the current world champion frisbee catching dog. He has an amazing 99.97 catch completion percentage. This translates into 3 missed catches in the last 10,000! One was his fault as he overestimated his leaping ability when he tried to catch a frisbee while jumping from one train to another train going in the opposite direction. The second miss came as a result of competitor jealousy when he attempted to catch a frisbee while recreating Homer Simpson's gorge jump on a skateboard. They never did catch the mutt that loosened his wheels. The last miss occured when he was distracted by the newly crowned Miss American Puppy, so we really can't fault him for that.
Below are the four members of the hottest up and coming Nascar support team on the circuit. Indy, Chester, Dorman, and Argus, have the lowest average pit stop times ever recorded. This is partially due to their recent conversions from legs to wheels by the now famous Dr. Koch. Argus is the fluid specialist. His amazing sight provided by a state of the art lens (also customized by Dr. Koch) allows him to spot even the smallest oil leak. Chester and Dorman handle the fuel and tire issues. As small as they are, they have Herculean strength and lightning fast speed. Indy is the leader of the group. Constantly monitoring the car's vital statistics, Indy wirelessly transmits detailed instructions to the group so that not one movement is wasted. This is one team to watch closely in the future.

A skater who is a little past his prime, Van got his name when he over shot a rail slide and crashed through the window of a van parked nearby. As you can tell by the dents in his head, this kind of thing was not unusual for him. After many visits to Dr. Koch for replacement parts, Van has put away the skateboard and picked up a saw and drill to build new parks for kids.